Trying to Be Supermom Could be Bad for You and Your Children
Let’s make one thing clear – moms are super. It takes a powerful person to take on the responsibilities that come with raising a child. Women are somehow created with the ability to nurture, love, support, provide, and protect their children by any means necessary. As great as these qualities are to have, however, some women go to the extreme. Trying to ensure that their children have the best childhoods possible, they often try to take on too much on their own – and fail.
You’re Only Human
It’s true that women are awesome human beings – but the key word is they’re human. For the sake of their child’s health, happiness, and well-being, they try to do everything perfectly. The only problem is perfection isn’t possible. As a result, these women consume so much of their lives with their children’s, that they lose a sense of self, relationships, careers, dreams, and in some extreme cases, their physical and mental well-being.
Consequences of Trying to be Super
What’s wrong with wanting to be perfect in your role as a mother? What could be so bad about wanting the house spotless, meals prepared at the same time daily, clothes pressed and stain-free, or children with only the best manners and even better grades? Wanting your children to succeed in life, have more than you did growing up, or just to be happy and healthy are all realistic goals, but striving for perfection all the time will backfire. Here’s a breakdown of how trying to be a supermom can wreak havoc on your family.
- You Could Become Depressed – Perfection isn’t attainable, however, moms who try to be perfect can quickly become depressed. When they’re not meeting their marks, getting the results they want, or getting negative reactions from others, they begin to think less of themselves and their ability to parent.
- You Might Self-Medicate – What happens when you’re under a great deal of pressure and have (in your mind) nowhere to turn? Often people resort to unhealthy coping methods. Unfortunately, some women become so overwhelmed with their load as a supermom that they end up self-medicating. It starts off with a bit of wine here and there and then turns into dependency and the need for help from an addiction treatment center.
- You Could Resent Your Kids – Every mom would agree that there are some sacrifices that have to be made once you become a parent. However, women who are trying to be supermom or perfectionists, often sacrifice everything. They lack the time for personal relationships, professional goals, dreams, and desires. As time passes them by, they begin to resent their children for how much they gave up.
- Your Children Could Become Critical – Mothers who strive to be perfect often instill these same values in their children. Their kids, in turn, grow up being very critical of themselves and others. Some children can suffer from low self-esteem and anxiety.
Kids don’t come with an instruction manual when they’re born. There’s no one way to be a great mom. Trying to do all and be all for your children may seem like the best thing for your family, but trying to be a perfect mom could kill you. Realize that you’re only human, take the time to enjoy your children at each stage in their lives, don’t be afraid to ask for help, and simply go with the flow. You’ll lead a much better life and your children will love you all the more for simply being the best mom – not a supermom.